THE BEST COMES FROM MEXICO A Radio Commercial Script …such as it is
CARLOS Hola, I'm Carlos, the coffee guy from south of the border in Mexico. I'm here to tell you about the benefits of a good hot cup of Mexican coffee every morning to start your day.
GROGGY MAN OW! %#^@#!!! Geez, that hurts.
CARLOS Now that's how you are in the morning if you have skipped your cup of our aromatic Mexican coffee.
MAN Where's the %#^@# light switch? OUCH! My toe! Who put that chair there?
CARLOS Why would a person even want to get up in the morning without our delicious coffee?
MAN Whose voice is that? Did I leave the radio on again? I know the kitchen is around here somewhere…
CARLOS Our groggy man has forgotten he invited me to stay overnight. To his delight, if he finds the kitchen he will also discover me waiting with a steaming cup of our tasty café.
MAN Is someone here? I've got a gun and I know how to use it? Now where is that pistol…[Muttering…]
CARLOS That was some party last night. Working as a waiter has been so much fun for Carlos. I meet so many nice people. In fact, I met this gentleman and he offered me his couch to sleep on.
MAN Is somebody out there? [THUMP!] OW!
CARLOS He complimented the fine Mexican coffee I served him. His friends ordered the coffee for him because he had enjoyed too much tequila at dinner.
MAN [Sound of bumps and thumps and a dog wailing–Woooo!] Oh Rover! I'm sorry, boy! I didn't mean to step on you. Now where the %#^@# is that kitchen?
CARLOS You see–I…er…dropped into America…for a little visit, and I needed a place to stay…
MAN Ah! Here we are! I've found the kitchen at last…er…who are you?
CARLOS Good morning, Señor! I'm here to make you a hearty cup of delicious Mexican coffee.
MAN I thought coffee came from Columbia….err…who did you say you were?
CARLOS It is I, Carlos. I served you Mexican coffee last night. Columbia has coffee, but not as good as Mexico, by the way.
MAN Last night? At the party? I don't remember much…
CARLOS Si. You asked me to come home and make you a cup of our delicious Mexican coffee this morning. I was glad because I like to demonstrate to people how much better Mexican coffee is than Columbian.
MAN You don't say. Funny I don't remember any of this, but then again I had a few drinks…
CARLOS Si, Señor! You were enjoying some Mexican tequila, also very delicious.
MAN Ooooh, yes. Good tequila!
CARLOS So would you like some of this roasted aromatic Mexican coffee?
MAN Sure. I'll try a cup. Maybe I can taste it this time.
CARLOS Here you are, Señor.
[Man takes a noisy slurp]
MAN Hey, this is pretty good! I'm glad I brought you home last night.
CARLOS With all due respect, Señor, technically I brought you home. You were too drunk to drive.
MAN Whatever! I love this coffee!
CARLOS Everyone loves our coffee. Just remember at the store to ask for genuine Mexican coffee–the coffee to bring home for friends or have your friends bring you home for.
MAN Say, Pedro, could I have another cup?
End Copyright 2006 JO Janoski